I was a little hesitant to tell you this.
Lately, I’ve been working on a pattern that has quietly shaped much of my life:
A constant feeling of not doing enough… and a subtle guilt that follows.
Part of me wondered — If I’m still working on this, how can I support others?
But authenticity matters more to me.
So I’m sharing this with you — in service of your own reflection.
Recognizing the Pattern
Many of our patterns live in two places:
Mind: a belief we rarely question
Body: how that belief shows up physically
For me:
Mind: “I need to keep striving to feel safe.”
Body: a subtle forward-leaning posture — always ready to push, do, achieve
Even at rest, I can feel it — tightness, shallow breath, a pull toward “doing.”
Working with It
What’s been helpful is a simple practice:
Notice the pattern (bring it to awareness)
Name it as a belief — not truth
Interrupt it — even physically
For me, that means:
gently leaning back
softening my breath
allowing myself to receive, not just strive
I’m practicing and embodying a new belief:
I can live fully — not just achieve.
Extending This to Your Team
These patterns don’t just live within us — they shape how we lead.
What we experience internally rarely stays internal.
A leader’s internal pattern often becomes a team’s lived experience.
For example:
A tendency to over-strive can create constant urgency and pressure
A need to please can show up as avoiding tough conversations
A need for control can make delegation and trust difficult
Invitation
What is a pattern that once served you… but may now be holding you back?
How does it show up — not just in your thinking, but in your body?
And what might shift if you gently interrupt it?
Sometimes the deepest change begins with simply noticing what has been running quietly in the background.
